Yesterday night, after a long afternoon at IKEA, I got home and was laying in bed reading this article, which inspired me for the one I was doing today. It’s a bit in line with this one. I’m a firm believer that we can shape the way we do things throughout life. Some people are more into shaping than others but that comes attached to everything. I know I’m not the same girl I used to be and my actions and way of thinking reflect that. The decisions we make now will slowly start to habituate and root themselves in the foundation of character. So tag along for the habits we should learn now that our future selfs will thank us for:
1. Learning how to pick the things you actually need from the things you want. There’s a huge difference when it comes to picking out something we want. We have to ask ourselves, do I really need this? In order to get what we need, we have to stop wanting so many wrong things.
2. Learning how to say no. This is something I know comes with age. It’s not easy to say “no” to certain people, moments or experiences. We don’t want to restrain ourselves of doing something but at the same time wonder, should I be doing this? What’s my benefit? Especially when it comes to work, not every opportunity is worth pursuing.
3. Learning to let go. This is one of the hardest. It isn’t easy letting go of certain things – like grudges – but eventually you have to in order to move on to whatever it is you want to do. Things won’t have the same importance in a few hours, days or years so, it’s good to learn quickly what matters and what doesn’t.
4. Finding a way to blow off the negative aspects of your day. Wether it’s yoga, meditation, cycling, running or having a glass of wine in the quietude of your home, find that one thing that triggers calmness, stops your mind from going on and on and on. But make sure it’s not alcoholism or drug addiction. Not worth in the long run.
5. Knowing how to be alone. For me, this is the most important one. I know a lot of people who don’t know how to be alone. Wether you’re going to a movie, have a meal or just sit by yourself in the park, reading, they just don’t. I’ve learn this the hard way but I did. I don’t mind being alone or doing things by myself. On the contrary, I enjoy it. It’s a way to not depend constantly on someone else’s company to do whatever it is you want to do.
6. Letting go of things you cannot control. It’s impossible to live if you are always trying to manage everything that happens around you. You don’t have power over other people’s actions, thoughts and sayings and that’s a good thing. Imagine having to constantly be telling them everything instead of living your life? Not viable.
7. Learning how to stand up for yourself. That goes without saying. At some point in your life, you have to learn and find the best way to stand up for what you believe and want. Granted, it’s not always easy or right there in front of you, but you will eventually learn to do what suits you best, in spite of what people tell you.
8. Control the voice in your head. True, it’s always there but you have to learn how to control it in order to live your life. As we grow older, it tells you that you can’t do this or that because you’re too old or it’s too risky. Don’t stop doing what makes you feel alive because of it. I always have to control that voice when I’m going on a plane. It terrifies me. But if I don’t, I would never go on one again.
9. Giving people a second chance. I used to think that people didn’t deserve second chances and more often than that, they don’t. But I’ve come to learn that I also needed second chances so it’s important to do for others what we want people to do for us.
10. Work on what makes your heart beat. Sure, you can tell me it’s your blood and your lungs and everything else but if you have a chance – which doesn’t happen to everyone – take it and make it your own. Work for what you want but work hard and find no excuses. Excuses are only good to set us back and feeling sorry for ourselves. Be the best you can be – but sometimes give it a rest.